[He just shakes his head a bit at that - he doesn't seem to be disagreeing, more trying to clear his head, and it's...obvious that it's not working.]
...Six billion people, Jaeger.
[It's quiet when he says it; his voice is still surprisingly even, but it's likely becoming increasingly clear that that's because he doesn't know what he should do with his vocal inflection.]
I was prepared to kill at least six billion people.
[You really do like making this hard on him, don't you?]
I see. Obviously I don't approve of that at all, but that's what happened before all this. We're different people now - very different people. You wouldn't do something like that now and no matter what Retrospec wants us to believe, we're not exactly like the people we were.
You believe that, don't you?
[There's a hint of desperation in his voice. Please tell him you still believe that.]
[That's perhaps the most confident he's been since this conversation started. No matter how bad things get, he genuinely believes that Wesker never will be the same man he was before.]
You're the strongest person I know, Albert. No matter what happens - no matter what you remember - you'll always be you. You're not the same person you were back then and you never will be like him again. I have complete faith in that.
[His grip tightens a bit on Wesker's arm again, though it's not desperate this time.]
[Jaeger's touch is nice, for some reason that he can't figure out; it's comforting, in its own way, and despite himself he seems to be relaxing a little.]
...You keep saying that, regarding how strong you think I am. [...] It means a lot, hearing that.
[He shifts a bit, but he isn't trying to pull away from Jaeger's touch; he doesn't want to break that.]
If you're going to insist that I need to believe this, then so do you. You understand that much...?
Of course you will; nothing is going to change that.
[That response is immediate, at least; he's almost content to leave it at that, but after a moment's deliberation, he doesn't.
He moves forward a bit instead, and while it's infinitely more awkward to do it here than it is in dreams - and it was awkward as hell in Jaeger's dream that one time - he pulls Jaeger closer into what amounts to the world's most stilted embrace. It's obvious that he's bad at this still, and he'll let go if Jaeger wants him to, but for now this is...good, in some way that he isn't used to.]
[Jaeger hesitates for a brief moment, but before Wesker can pull away he's quick to latch on. His grip is probably a little too tight, but he doesn't want to let go any time soon.
For once in his life, Jaeger doesn't have anything to say. He'll just cling for a little while, if that's fine with everyone.]
He isn't exactly expecting the force with which Jaeger latches on to him, but he doesn't try to pull away from it, either; after a while one of his hands will shift upwards to tousle the back of his hair gently, and while the gesture is uncertain it's probably the closest to affectionate that he's been with anyone in a long time.
He won't move, or try to encourage him to let go; he'll stay where he is, don't worry - he's not going anywhere.]
[Oh, that's nice... The tension leaves Jaeger all at once and for a moment he just sort of leans on Wesker while he relaxes. It's sort of silly, but he's really missed physical affection like this.
He'll find words eventually, but they're sort of muffled.]
...Thank you. I'm fine, I'm just... tired, suddenly. I don't really want to move right now.
[His hand pauses for a brief moment against Jaeger's hair when he's leaned up against more thoroughly, though he'll start up again easily enough; he sounds decidedly calmer when he replies - genuinely so, not the odd sort of forced calmness from before.]
As long as you want - I wasn't going anywhere.
[It's weirding him out a little, but it's nice, overall; he doesn't particularly want to move either, if he's honest.]
[It's still sort of mumbled, quiet in a way he usually isn't. It's content-sounding, though.]
I never would have imagined our lives would turn out like this. Not that I'm complaining, of course. Thank you, Albert.
[He's not sure what part of this he's thanking Wesker for. Telling him about all of this? Trusting him with it? Just letting him cling for awhile as he sorts himself out? All of that, probably.]
[Wesker isn't sure what he's being thanked for, either, but he's not going to argue with it any; there's a fair amount to argue there, granted, but for the time being he's content to just keep stroking Jaeger's hair and hold him for a while longer.
His immediate response is to want to say that Jaeger deserves it, but he bites it back; it's striking him a bit too roughly for the time being, saying what people do and don't deserve, and it sort of begs the question of whether he thinks in those terms because of his past life's fixation on judgement. It's not something he wants to think about for too long right now, though it's going to bother him later.
For now, though...for now he just shifts slightly, nuzzling up a little before he settles; he's not really a physically affectionate person and it shows, but he's doing what he can for the time being.]
...You don't have to thank me for any of this. I did tell you that I'll do what I can for you.
[Oh, that's... really nice, actually. Jaeger leans into that a bit before resettling once Wesker stops. He didn't realize how badly he needed something like this, but now he never wants to let go.]
Ja, I know. And you do a very good job of that! I'm so thankful I've had the opportunity to get to know you so well.
[Even though all of this mess with Retrospec is horrible... he can't say he completely hates it. It did bring him closer to Wesker, after all.]
[The feeling of Jaeger's grip tightening gets a soft but pleased noise out of him; it feels nice, and he's sort of vibrating a little, but it's understated, not nearly the level of shaking that he was doing earlier.]
[He sounds pleased though, and he's comfortable right where he is. Wesker's not the only one vibrating a bit; Jaeger's not shaking, exactly, but he's obviously worked up in a good way. This is really nice. He doesn't want to move ever.]
[He'll remain where he is for a moment longer before pulling away, however; he doesn't pull his hands away entirely, he's maintaining some degree of contact, just not as extensively as it has been for the past while.]
...Things are...better, I suppose, now that we've done that.
I do appreciate it. I think it's important for me to know, no matter how badly I react to it. So... Thank you. I'm sure it's difficult to talk about something like that.
no subject
I'm here for you, okay? No matter what. I'm not going to leave. I'll be by your side for as long as you want me here.
[His grip has tightened on Wesker's arm and he forces himself to loosen it so he doesn't have a death hold on the other man.]
Whatever happens, whatever else you remember, we'll face it together. If I can handle this, I can handle anything else your memories have in store.
[And dear god, he hopes he can handle this.]
no subject
...Six billion people, Jaeger.
[It's quiet when he says it; his voice is still surprisingly even, but it's likely becoming increasingly clear that that's because he doesn't know what he should do with his vocal inflection.]
I was prepared to kill at least six billion people.
no subject
I see. Obviously I don't approve of that at all, but that's what happened before all this. We're different people now - very different people. You wouldn't do something like that now and no matter what Retrospec wants us to believe, we're not exactly like the people we were.
You believe that, don't you?
[There's a hint of desperation in his voice. Please tell him you still believe that.]
no subject
I won't become that. Regardless of what Retrospec wants, I'm not...
[He shakes his head again; this is...it's difficult, and it's not something he really knows how to articulate.
He does want to believe that; he just...isn't sure how much he legitimately does.]
no subject
[That's perhaps the most confident he's been since this conversation started. No matter how bad things get, he genuinely believes that Wesker never will be the same man he was before.]
You're the strongest person I know, Albert. No matter what happens - no matter what you remember - you'll always be you. You're not the same person you were back then and you never will be like him again. I have complete faith in that.
[His grip tightens a bit on Wesker's arm again, though it's not desperate this time.]
no subject
...You keep saying that, regarding how strong you think I am. [...] It means a lot, hearing that.
[He shifts a bit, but he isn't trying to pull away from Jaeger's touch; he doesn't want to break that.]
If you're going to insist that I need to believe this, then so do you. You understand that much...?
no subject
[He doesn't pull away, but he does pat Wesker's arm for emphasis. It's important that Wesker knows exactly how much he means to Jaeger.
That question only gets a momentary pause from him before he nods.]
Ja, I know. I think I'll be okay now. No matter what I remember, I'll have you to help me through it, won't I?
no subject
[That response is immediate, at least; he's almost content to leave it at that, but after a moment's deliberation, he doesn't.
He moves forward a bit instead, and while it's infinitely more awkward to do it here than it is in dreams - and it was awkward as hell in Jaeger's dream that one time - he pulls Jaeger closer into what amounts to the world's most stilted embrace. It's obvious that he's bad at this still, and he'll let go if Jaeger wants him to, but for now this is...good, in some way that he isn't used to.]
no subject
For once in his life, Jaeger doesn't have anything to say. He'll just cling for a little while, if that's fine with everyone.]
no subject
He isn't exactly expecting the force with which Jaeger latches on to him, but he doesn't try to pull away from it, either; after a while one of his hands will shift upwards to tousle the back of his hair gently, and while the gesture is uncertain it's probably the closest to affectionate that he's been with anyone in a long time.
He won't move, or try to encourage him to let go; he'll stay where he is, don't worry - he's not going anywhere.]
no subject
He'll find words eventually, but they're sort of muffled.]
...Thank you. I'm fine, I'm just... tired, suddenly. I don't really want to move right now.
[Indulge him for a little longer, okay?]
no subject
As long as you want - I wasn't going anywhere.
[It's weirding him out a little, but it's nice, overall; he doesn't particularly want to move either, if he's honest.]
no subject
[It's still sort of mumbled, quiet in a way he usually isn't. It's content-sounding, though.]
I never would have imagined our lives would turn out like this. Not that I'm complaining, of course. Thank you, Albert.
[He's not sure what part of this he's thanking Wesker for. Telling him about all of this? Trusting him with it? Just letting him cling for awhile as he sorts himself out? All of that, probably.]
no subject
His immediate response is to want to say that Jaeger deserves it, but he bites it back; it's striking him a bit too roughly for the time being, saying what people do and don't deserve, and it sort of begs the question of whether he thinks in those terms because of his past life's fixation on judgement. It's not something he wants to think about for too long right now, though it's going to bother him later.
For now, though...for now he just shifts slightly, nuzzling up a little before he settles; he's not really a physically affectionate person and it shows, but he's doing what he can for the time being.]
...You don't have to thank me for any of this. I did tell you that I'll do what I can for you.
no subject
Ja, I know. And you do a very good job of that! I'm so thankful I've had the opportunity to get to know you so well.
[Even though all of this mess with Retrospec is horrible... he can't say he completely hates it. It did bring him closer to Wesker, after all.]
no subject
It almost makes the entire experience worthwhile, doesn't it.
[As much as he'd prefer to not have all of these damn memories in his head, he can't deny that this much is good.]
no subject
[This much is absolutely good; he can't imagine what his life would be like without Wesker in it, after all.]
no subject
Just give him a moment; he's overstimulated in a way that he usually isn't.]
no subject
I'm so glad I've had the opportunity to get to know you, Albert. I don't know if I can ever express just how much that means to me.
[The words are still sort of muffled, but he sounds happy.]
no subject
...It means a lot to me, hearing that. Thank you.
no subject
[He sounds pleased though, and he's comfortable right where he is. Wesker's not the only one vibrating a bit; Jaeger's not shaking, exactly, but he's obviously worked up in a good way. This is really nice. He doesn't want to move ever.]
Not that I'll complain, though~
no subject
[He'll remain where he is for a moment longer before pulling away, however; he doesn't pull his hands away entirely, he's maintaining some degree of contact, just not as extensively as it has been for the past while.]
...Things are...better, I suppose, now that we've done that.
no subject
I'm glad to hear that. I do want to help, after all! It's a bit difficult to know what to do or say to something like that, though.
no subject
I know it scares you, hearing about things like that. I tell you these things because you deserve to know; I'm not looking for you to do anything.
no subject
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)