scythegun | week 3; thursday

[Well, that's...interesting; not going to lie, his kneejerk response is to wonder why Yeager decided that he needs to discuss things with him of all people, especially since the note is looking decidedly less-than-perfect this time around and god knows Yeager likes his appearances.

But then, maybe it's the same reason Kevin likes to talk to him sometimes - because sometimes you want someone to have a not-normal reaction to shit instead of pretending that they understand or acting like they know what's best for you or getting upset on anybody's behalf. You just want to talk at someone, and the fact that they have no empathy whatsoever and will be approximately as blunt as a sock full of batteries to the face with you if you're being fucking stupid is a good thing.

...Or maybe Yeager just doesn't have any fucking friends and Top Dollar's someone that he can tolerate long enough to have a conversation - it's hard to tell with that one, and it's not like Top Dollar particularly cares one way or another.

That said, he'll be there shortly enough; there's just a long enough interval in between receiving the note and showing up for him to make sure his fucking hair isn't a total wreck and that he's actually got his shit together as well as he thinks he does. He leaves his guns off in his room; there's not much need of them in Yeager's room, he's pretty sure.

Anyway. He'll let himself in as expected, taking up his usual position near the wall by the door and leaning back against it, ensuring the door is closed behind him as he does so.]

Looks like you're being...productive.

["Productive."]

Not at all, actually!

[And that's said with all the usual forced cheerfulness, but he crumples up the paper he was working on with a lot of unnecessary force before turning to Top Dollar with a smile that's very clearly not pleased. He's trying. It's absolutely not working, but he's trying.]

I'm glad you came. I need a moment to vent and I'm not about to do that in front of anyone else.

[He's already saddled Duke with enough of his problems and he's not going to do it today. Top Dollar's the acceptable alternative, apparently.]

[...What the absolute fuck are you doing, Yeager, you're a mess.]

Then you can quit doing that. Thing. You're doing with your face.

[The statement is accompanied with a vague gesture in Yeager's general direction. YOU KNOW. THE THING. THAT YOU DO WITH YOUR FACE.]

I don't give a shit if you're not gonna radiate sunshine for a while, and no one else is fuckin' here.

It's actually very difficult to turn off, you know! After doing it for ten years straight I have a very difficult time doing anything but this!

[HE DID THIS TO HIMSELF, THIS IS HIS PUNISHMENT]

But I'll try. I believe the only people who haven't seen me like this are Duke and Hazama.

[WHICH IS KIND OF PART OF THE PROBLEM, ACTUALLY!!]

Nah, I get it.

[To some extent he...does; he just doesn't go aggressively cheerful about it. But the whole zero-feelings-about-this thing is kind of a constant.]

So you gonna tell me what's going on, or...?

Have you ever experienced something that you wouldn't have expected to bother you, but it somehow managed to bother you a tremendous amount anyway? Because that's exactly what this is. I barely know Aki and even though I do have a soft spot for children I knew there was a possibility she'd die here because she is the easiest target.

[He sighs and reaches up to mess with his bangs. The cheerful attitude is fading, however.]

...Had she been killed instead of... of this... Well, I have no doubt I'd find that more depressing than the other deaths, but it wouldn't bother me like this.

[Oh. That, right - ]

Yeah. Like I was saying, there's a reason I'm not jumping to the guy's defense.

[He shifts a bit where he's standing. Folds his arms, idly tapping his fingers on one hand against his sleeve.]

I'm not gonna pretend that I'd give a shit if the girl died. I don't really like kids, never had any idea how to talk to 'em. She comes over and acts cute at me sometimes, but if she got killed here it wouldn't be a major loss.

But you heard me back there. I don't do torture.

Neither do I. I won't lie, I'd certainly prefer it if he was dead, but...

[There's a possibility that he'll prove useful. Yeager sighs and folds his arms.]

I liked Hazama. I spoke with him quite frequently even after we were no longer confined to the same room. As strange as he was, I enjoyed his company. I knew he was insane, but somehow I thought it would never come to this.

[Which is stupid and frustrating, because he knows better than anyone else back home that you don't trust the insane people, no matter how charming they seem.]

This sort of thing never would have happened to my daughters, even at that age. But this is just a pleasant reminder that I'm here and I can't help them if something goes poorly.

[They're basically adults now and he had thought he was fine letting everything go back home, but things have changed and now that he knows more about what's going to happen... Well, he can't rest until he's back home and he's made sure Droite and Gauche are safe.

This has basically been the perfect storm of ISSUES HE DIDN'T KNOW HE HAD and he hates it.]

...I'll see what I can do about Hazama. Keep him on a leash and keep him away from the kids. I don't agree with what they want to do to him, but...

[More vague one-handed gesturing at nothing; it's more of a frustrated movement than anything.]

For fuck's sake. He just had to go and be a goddamn idiot, didn't he.

[Seriously.]

I'm not gonna insist that you have to be in love with the guy. At the same time, he's a fuckin' asset and he's one of mine, as much as I hate that.

I'll see to it that you end up back with your girls, though. And if you want him put down after this...then shit, I'll see to that too. Or at least make sure you get the chance to do it yourself.

No, I'm aware that he can still be useful. That's why I'm trying to keep my personal opinion in check. I don't wish to speak with him, but if it's necessary I will.

[He doesn't foresee it going well, but he won't shove a sword in Hazama's face.]

You certainly are being very accommodating, though! I do appreciate it.

[Even if it's kind of difficult for him to act like he's sincere about it.

...But now that he's thinking about it...]

Actually, why didn't you decide what to do with him on your own? Why did you open it up for discussion?

Do you not think I should've?

[It's not...defensive, per se, but it is incredibly blunted.]

No, that's actually the best decision you could have made given the circumstances. Had you made the decision to keep him alive on your own that would have only led to an argument. Had you killed him on your own... well, I suppose that would have gone better, but letting the group decide certainly builds more trust in you.

[...]

I just wouldn't have expected that to be your solution.

You think you know me real fuckin' well by now, don't you.

[He doesn't seem offended, though, and while it's dry it's not the sort of thing that indicates that Yeager is wrong, either; he does tip his head down a bit, however - not looking at anything in particular, just deciding that eye contact isn't going to be a thing while he thinks that over.]

I was gonna keep him alive, that was the decision we came to last night. I'd keep him alive, watch him and make sure he didn't do anything too stupid. Figure out what to do from there. But that's...

[Mnnngh.]

That's not really a decision I could make, in the end. There are some things that're just like that.

[...]

How'd you say it - something that you didn't expect to bother you, but it actually ended up bothering you a lot more than you thought it would? It was something like that.

[Yeager doesn't seem to know what to do with the initial statement there; yes, he thought he knew Top Dollar well enough by now to assume just what he'd do in a situation like this, but then that's been sort of a problem for him in the past, hasn't it? Assuming what people will do, that is. He thought he knew Hazama pretty well too, and just look at this mess.

He doesn't interrupt, but the blank look finally fades into something a bit more natural as Top Dollar finishes.]

Ja, I see.

[He could leave it at that. He probably should leave it at that. But he's actually learned something from his time here and while it's still really awkward and it feels sort of wrong sometimes... talking about it really has helped him.]

Do you... Is it something you want to talk about?

[The hesitation is clear, but it's not because he doesn't want to hear it, exactly. It's more like he's not sure if it's the right question to ask.]

We don't have to, of course.

[...Does he? He isn't altogether sure he necessarily wants to talk about it, because this entire thing isn't something that he broadcasts to anyone, much less people he's known for less than a month. It's his business, and it's his family's business, and it's business that needs to involve exactly no one else.

But now his family's dead, everyone he might actually conceivably talk to about this is dead, and while he's okay with the idea of all of this dying with them there's also the part where this has already fucked his judgement up once and he'd prefer that it not happen again.

So when he speaks it's just...blunt, there's nothing in his tone to imply that it's bothering him, though the look in his eyes has gone incredibly blank and the lack of investment in what's being said isn't really a natural thing.]

...It's just that my family life was a little fucked up, that's all. I was thinking earlier about what Hazama did to the kid, and I was thinking that her childhood is over. Because my daddy taught me that childhood is over the moment you know you're going to die.

He taught me that lesson on my fifth birthday. By that time mine had been over for half a year, I guess.

[...]

My daddy taught me a lot of things. Some lessons didn't set in as well as the others, I guess. Took a lot to get it through my head. So, yeah.

[He shrugs a bit; his voice isn't fluctuating any, even if his eyes are a bit...bright. Strictly an involuntary thing, mind, and not something he seems all that conscious of - he doesn't even seem that outwardly bothered - but still.]

I could deal with Hazama if I had to. He's one of mine, and he fucked up - it happens, I've dealt with this sort of shit before, it's not like I'm going to get my fuckin' problems with it all over him.

But that's not an executive decision I should be making, you know?

[Well, that's... That says everything, doesn't it? Yeager is quiet for a moment, eyes locked at some point on the ground while he tries to work out what to say to that. Several of his guys have come from terrible homes, but he was lucky. He isn't really sure how to deal with this.]

...I'm sorry. I understand though, and I can see why you didn't want it left in your hands. I know I wouldn't have been able to make a logical decision if it had been left up to me. I can't consider Hazama one of mine now, but I won't let my bias get in the way of doing what's best for all of us. I won't do anything to mess with him either, since he's one of yours.

[It's an attempt, anyway. He finds that his hand is on his chest and he quickly folds his arms instead.]

I do believe what you did was best, regardless of how much of a disaster that discussion was. I was actually shocked by how many people were suggesting torture.

[It takes him a moment to refocus, but once he has it's as though nothing had just happened; he shifts a little, bringing one hand up to toy with his hair - it's still incredibly nice, as it has been for about half the week now, caramel-macchiato nice.

He lets his fingers run over the ends of it, the gesture idle.]

He's only still one of mine because he wasn't attacking me personally. He's never stabbed me in the back, he's never disrespected me. So I'm not gonna disown him over this - sometimes shit happens, sometimes my guys get a bit too excited or they decide they can handle something when they can't, sometimes they just straight-out fuck up. I look after 'em anyway, no matter how bad they shit the bed, because that's just what my position says I should be doing.

[He'll kill them if he deems it necessary and he won't have a second thought about it, if it comes to that; at the same time, he's an aggressively "ride or die" person. It's just how he is, and really? Chaotic Evil gets to have all the feelings that it wants, but once you're actually responsible for people that's when the feelings stop.

So he'll look after his guys, Hazama included. At the same time...]

Torture's over a line for me, though. I don't give a shit who's suggesting it. If we're going to kill each other, we do it like we've got some sort of standards.

I was not expecting to have to argue that with so many people.

[Yeager's has been exactly that nice as well, actually! It's good to be prepared, just in case.]

It's bizarre, honestly. I've never had that problem with any of my employees and one of them was the most insane person I've ever met. It's so strange that so many people would want to torture him.

[We're surrounded by crazy people, Top Dollar.]

...I mean, I run into that problem a lot, but at least my guys all know that if it's happening I don't want to hear about it.

[YES. YES WE ARE.]

It's a bit ridiculous, ja? At least everyone seems to have settled on that now.

Of course, I don't really see how what they're wanting to do is any better.

[...The whole...chain-him-up-and-leave-him-to-die thing.]

Frankly, neither do I. I have no doubt that we'll revisit the issue after someone else dies. I'm assuming it'll be soon as well, since most murders happen around this time.

[...]

You still got that key on you? The one Sandra gave you.

Ja, I do. I'm not helping, but if you want into the room I'll let you in.

Won't need your help, just need the key. I'm guessing he'll be a bit more willing to behave after a few days in there.

[Don't worry, he's not going to make you talk to the guy.]

I might need your help with something in a bit, though. Just to give you some advance warning.

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